Hey Majestic Daughter! What’s happening?
Shifting back into Corporate America this year, caused everything within me to question my journey. Weeks went by that I was in a dark place of searching for answers to what was shifting in my life. I felt that I had messed up and missed up my opportunity that I know God had told me was my portion.
I wasn’t supposed to grace Corporate America ever again. So why was I here? Then to tell people what was happening caused me so much agony and pain. I knew I was purposed to do more but why was I experiencing this gethsemane moment.
Why was my inner circle over there and not able to help me?
I even tried to explain what I was experiencing mentally and spiritually but no one truly understood. It was a stabbing pain in my soul, that not even I could fix. I knew that this was my next, but I was still in my now of accepting that this is where I am going.
Although I was trying to make my inner circle understand my pain, I had to reach a moment of just moving forward alone. As I shifted forward, I found myself praying to Abba, Father, “To let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will.”
When I got up, I just knew that Abba, Father heard me and would reverse the thing that I knew was getting ready to happen. Even when I went to check to see if my inner circle understood what I was going through, they truly didn’t understand what I was experiencing.
I was not okay with the Lord's plan for my life. I struggled with it. Have you ever been there?
I kept searching for the face of Abba, Father to tell me that He was going to let this pass me by. I kept praying until January 6th arrived and I walked through those corporate doors.
I knew the Father's will would be done in me and through me. I knew I had to get up and go forth with His plan.
I wanted to QUIT! I didn’t want to do life as a Christian, this was way too challenging, painful, confusing, etc. I was having a pity party – as I usually do. I wanted to build my business, ministry and all the other things God had purposed me to do. It was all about what “I” wanted to do, not God.
The enemy wanted me to QUIT because on the other side of this was…
My season to RESET! I had to reflect on everything that I had added to my plate and evaluate the things I had to let go.
Was it hard? YES!
I had to limit conversations, halt the teen mentoring program, stand up for myself and say no to projects and so much more. I learned that my talents and skills can often get me boggled down with stuff that doesn’t align with my purpose.
I had to realign with the will of God and be BRAVE in knowing that He knows the plans He has for me. I’m committed to following Jesus even when I can’t trace what he’s up too. I had to grow up and learn how to trust God and stop giving up every time things don’t go the way I planned. I had to get (I) out the way so (HE) can have control. I REFUSE TO QUIT!
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